My seemingly never-ending search for holiday bargains online has led to more and more store-related email finding its way into my gmail.
The other day, I opened my gmail to find this:
Well, not exactly this but something, unbelievably, inspired by these guys, who, by the way, are members of the Swiss Army.
Who knew the Swiss even had an army?
And besides, even now knowing they do have an army, why would the poster boys (gals) of military neutrality even need to dress in camouflage?
But I digress...
What is this fabulous consumer product inspired by the Swiss Army?
A Swiss army gun, complete with toothpick and scissors?
A -40 degree sleeping bag for those nights spent in the Alps?
Au contraire.
Apparently, the Swiss Army has a secret weapon.
Yes, that's right. For only $23.99, you too may project an aroma of neutrality with either Swiss Army cologne for men or, believe it or not, Swiss Army perfume for women. There's even an androgynous version for those who take non-alignment to heart.
Both fragrances tout their "refreshing" fragrance, complete with tones of "moss... and musk."Now, I don't know about you, but I have never really been attraced to a military muskiness. The men in my life are fully capable of generating an army aroma all their own with seemingly very little effort and even less expense.
And personally, I think it would be somewhat negligent of me to encourage my teenage daughter to wear eau de barracks to high school.
No word yet on whether Swiss Army Fragrance has become standard issue. If so, let's hope the Swiss maintain their neutrality.
I doubt it would take long for enemy combatants to identify that telltale scent of Edelweiss and citrus...
The other day, I opened my gmail to find this:
Well, not exactly this but something, unbelievably, inspired by these guys, who, by the way, are members of the Swiss Army.Who knew the Swiss even had an army?
And besides, even now knowing they do have an army, why would the poster boys (gals) of military neutrality even need to dress in camouflage?
But I digress...
What is this fabulous consumer product inspired by the Swiss Army?
A Swiss army gun, complete with toothpick and scissors?
A -40 degree sleeping bag for those nights spent in the Alps?
Au contraire.
Apparently, the Swiss Army has a secret weapon.
Yes, that's right. For only $23.99, you too may project an aroma of neutrality with either Swiss Army cologne for men or, believe it or not, Swiss Army perfume for women. There's even an androgynous version for those who take non-alignment to heart.Both fragrances tout their "refreshing" fragrance, complete with tones of "moss... and musk."Now, I don't know about you, but I have never really been attraced to a military muskiness. The men in my life are fully capable of generating an army aroma all their own with seemingly very little effort and even less expense.
And personally, I think it would be somewhat negligent of me to encourage my teenage daughter to wear eau de barracks to high school.
No word yet on whether Swiss Army Fragrance has become standard issue. If so, let's hope the Swiss maintain their neutrality.
I doubt it would take long for enemy combatants to identify that telltale scent of Edelweiss and citrus...
3 comments:
We might be neutral but when it comes to defending our country from intruders or our perfume from criticism, then we are willing to fight. You must cease and desist or we will be required to fight back in the American way, in the court of law.
blencha
my understanding is that the Swiss army has always been state-of-the-art and pretty big, too, with the second largest military per capita next to Israel. this has been necessary to staying neutral. for example, during WWII, the thing that kept Hitler from invading Switzerland was the near-impenitrable Alps, which were heavily fortified by the swiss military.Hitler didn't respect their neutrality, he simply didn't have the man power necessary to conquer Switzerland. the Nazis actually had a battle plan for taking Switzerland, but it required too much resources, and so Switzerland was left alone.
We not only do have an army, which is highly trained, but you should also check con what Onyx is about.
When it comes to intelligence gathering and secrets keeping, we are far more advanced than most of other countries.
I tell you this out of my personal experience, patriotism is not involved.
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